When Josh graduated on a warm Sunday in May 2007, his high school diploma ended our relationship. I wrote a column about how the door closing affected me, and it was significant. Here's how it starts:
“Go ahead, Mentor. Do it. I'm signing a simple and powerful contract between you and the young man. Plant one hour a week and reap a changed world.”
If you think this space is a break from the intrigue of modern civil and political debate, you're wrong. The topic of age has been dominating a lot of headlines lately. That's what I'm doing here. I write about age…but at the other end of the continuum are teenagers.
Today, 80-year-olds may change the world, but young people have to live in it for a long time. Or until they themselves change it. So why not give your children the right equipment? Expand children's social development, build resilience, improve problem-solving skills, embrace their future through goal setting, and reduce the likelihood of them falling prey to risky behaviors. Research shows these are the benefits of mentoring that are enough to change the direction of mentored teens now and in the future.
When it comes to the world that has changed, the world we have now is definitely full of hopes, dreams, progress, and goodness. But enough hell and handbags have taken up residence in our minds and problems that we need a course correction. For more information, visit your local home page or peek through the social media cesspool.
Then think about how young people are feeling who are already dealing with the normal burdens that teenagers face trying to fit in, be recognized, and be accepted. And now they are witnessing the eroding exclusion carried out publicly by those who should know better, by those who never will, and by those whose only skillset is to degrade and dismiss. We have to deal with the undertow. Some of them have the Holy Scriptures when they know.
Yes, I write about age…but also about mentors, adults outside the teen's immediate family, and the important relationships between them and the teen mentee.
Josh was my teammate, so the day he walked across the big stage with the sheepskin in his hand, our official relationship ended. TeamMates is a school-based mentoring program started by Tom Osborne.
I matched with Josh when he was in 7th grade. He was the first of my six teammates, and so was he, but I only met Taylor, Sean, LaShawn, Aiden, and Alex at school: lunch breaks, study hall, and free time. was. We played games, did homework (algebra was of little use), shot hoops, played catch, built mechanical toys, and as kids often say, , most “chopped” (talked) for less than an hour a week. .
When I started working at Hastings College, I had to give up being a teammate. I knew this decision would mean I wouldn't be able to have weekly visits with Alex. What I wasn't prepared for was the impact of not having my teammates. Again, it was a lot.
My column about Josh's graduation day began with the above command, but my message was twofold. First, mentoring works on the surface because a caring and consistent adult provides the teen with experience and, in some cases, wisdom. That was true for me too, but my boyfriend's TeamMate experience was a little different. Of course, I gave my two cents whenever I could. But I always seemed to be getting more out of the relationship than I put in, always being a constant participant in their lives, being there once a week, and just “cutting it out” until graduation. .
My people have also come from a variety of situations, from fairly stable middle-class families to homelessness. While this was somewhat relevant, the fundamentals of mentoring relationships, whether Nebraska's 60 formal mentoring programs or the millions of informal one-on-one mentoring relationships across the country, There are no circumstances that prevent what the premise is. It can never be placed in the kids corner. There are too many caring adults.
This was my second point. Research shows that while mentoring relationships may seem natural or free-flowing, formal programs provide the most mentorship. Additionally, there remains a great need for adults to step up, including in Nebraska.
So why not? Why not become a mentor? Why not do something about the age issue?
Do you need time? At my newspaper, we as mentors convinced our bosses that mentoring was important enough to give us an hour a week. You can do the same.
please. Mentor.
You too might make a little difference in the world. You will surely change your teenager. And if you're lucky…so will you.
